if the pounding hadn’t been enough.
was banging deserved whatever came out of her mouth. Pushing hair out of her eyes, she snapped the lock and yanked the door open.
getting away with some mischievous prank. Eyebrows raised, he lifted a cup of coffee from the crook of his elbow and held it towards her. Pink lettering on the cup showed the logo from the coffee shop around the corner. The bright morning sun set red-gold highlights aglitter in his hair while his eyes crinkled at the corners. A dimple dipped into his cheek.
here?” She groaned at her own rudeness, a moment later remembering his pounding
on the door. He always had brought out the best—and the worst in her. She
pushed the screen open as he continued to hold the cup towards her. Fingertip
to fingertip, Margaret felt the tingle shoot up her arm. She took the coffee
and let the screen door slap closed between them as she gripped the door frame.
can’t deal with him today. Leaving is hard enough. Please, Lord, give me
strength. She shivered then glanced up and down the street, refusing to
meet his gaze. Lukas had always seen too much—as if he could see straight into
her soul.
and she looked down the street again, hoping for a savior in the form of a
moving van. They should be here in about fifteen minutes.
Why isn’t he saying anything? Silently, she raised the coffee towards her mouth
and a waft of steam touched her lips. She lowered it without taking a sip.
third pickup pulled in. The door of the red van parked out front opened. She
looked from one vehicle to the other trying to see who was in them. What are
these trucks doing in my yard?
knew everyone, at least the faces that belonged, even some that passed through,
often on their way to Sonora. And the people gathering in her yard belonged
here. They had been friends with her and Peter for years. But they all said
goodbye at the party last night.
waiting…
“Your caravan awaits.”
soon. I told you yesterday that I was all set.”
“What? You don’t think we have enough help here?” He turned back towards
Margaret, his blue eyes frowning at her.
don’t want to put anyone out. It would just be easier…”
will miss you and we want the chance to show you how we feel.” He held her
gaze, his voice soft spoken.
thought she saw there. Heat—a slow burn, a smoldering fire. He couldn’t
possibly still…She shook herself and looked away. His problem. He’s the one who
walked away.
“Remember the small going away party last night?” She pictured him manning the
grill, spatula in hand. That was supposed to be their goodbye. The kiss at the
end of the night had been enough of a surprise to keep her tossing and turning
for hours. She didn’t need any more unexpected surprises like that. “What am I
supposed to do? Leave the moving company a note that I’m all set?” Once again,
Margaret lifted the cup for a tentative sip.
answer in kind.
of it? They are still coming, right?”
ashamed?
regardless, you better believe they’ll be providing their services.” She
clenched her fist. Some things just never changed. He always did think he knew
what was best. How dare he? She wanted to stomp her foot at his
high-handedness—slam the door in his face. Oh, she was tempted. Lucky for him
God had made a new woman of her. He was the only one holding back her temper,
she was sure.
all right.”
doing.” His tone was steady, the smile falling flat when his gaze met hers.
As if he has any say in my life anymore. You gave up that right a long time
ago, buddy. She shook her head, trying to quiet the argument going on in
her mind. She glared at him, tilting her chin. “And what if I want the moving
company to come, anyway?”
anyone getting hurt moving my stuff. The furniture is heavy and I would really
rather the professionals take care of it. And what if something gets broken? I
don’t want anyone feeling responsible for any damages. The movers have
insurance for that kind of thing.”
know how to lift stuff. No one’s going to get hurt and nothing will be broken.”
you even if they did get hurt. I can also guarantee that no feelings will be
hurt by you accepting the help that’s offered. No such guarantees on a
refusal.” His stare bit into her.
his words…and what a shrew she would look like if she sent everyone away—if
they would even leave. Plus, it was probably too late to reschedule the movers,
and she had to be moved out today. The new owners would be here tomorrow.
vacation schedule just to help me move. With Christmas just past and getting
themselves ready to head back to school I’m sure they have better things to
do.”
away from here, in Solsta.” She glanced at the vehicles in her yard, then back
at Lukas. “Let me at least pay for their gas.”
make? I would have been paying the movers.”
He took a sip of his coffee and looked over his shoulder. “Oops, looks like the
gang’s all here.”
teacher. They stepped out and waved, smiling as they started up the walkway.
hand to brush the hair away from her eyes again. “Thank you so much. I really
didn’t want to put anyone out, especially just after Christmas like this.”
if he knew I didn’t help you with your move.” The principal came halfway up the
walkway and crossed his arms over his chest, planting his feet apart. “Matter
of fact, he would never forgive me for letting you go to begin with.”
uncertain terms, that these people cared about her and that she should let them
help. They were her friends.
would tell her she couldn’t run away from it all, that she would carry it with
her no matter where she went. He would also have told her that God had a plan
and that she ought to pray to understand what His will was in all this.
You. I have to go. I can’t stay here. After two years of stumbling around
and mourning her half-hearted attempt at marriage, she couldn’t live with the
grief or the guilt anymore. She knew God had forgiven her, but she didn’t
deserve it.
have been…sorry I didn’t love you as much as I should have…sorry I never gave
you the child you so desperately wanted.
watery vision cleared. Worrying her bottom lip, she looked from one face to
another, then cleared her throat and sniffed. “Well, I guess since you’re here,
and the movers aren’t coming…” She looked pointedly at Lukas. “…I’ll have to
put you all to work.” She pushed the screen door open. “Come on in. We might as
well get started.”
and looked around. “No stray Christmas decorations that you might have missed?”
didn’t put any up this year.” Or last year…
where to start, so Margaret continued into the kitchen. Lukas glanced at the
boxes and nodded towards them. “Why don’t you finish what you were doing? We’ll
load the furniture and by the time we’re done you’ll have those ready to go. Is
that the last of it to be packed up?”
with well-choreographed steps, each person going where they were needed. Jokes
and laughter filled the house as they loaded her life into their trucks.
used for breakfast this morning, plus the few other items still in the
cupboards. A half hour later, after checking all the cabinets and drawers one
last time, she taped the final box closed and lifted her head in time to see a
lamp sliding towards the floor.
colliding with Margaret’s. He turned back to the job at hand. “Nice save.”
jeans and walked down the hall without a word. Wandering from room to room, she
double-checked everything. Closets were empty, no boxes forgotten. The shadows
on the walls outlined stark reminders of where pictures had been. The
unfinished projects—a cracked floorboard, chipped molding, a small hole in the
plaster, all stared at her accusingly.
God, why Peter? He was the good one.
Margaret took a deep breath, wiped her cheek, and stepped into what had been
Peter’s sickroom. She walked to the window seat and stared out into the
backyard, arms clutched around her middle. There would be no sound of children
playing, no sitting on the glider growing old together. She put a hand on the
window. If only I could have loved you more—
down the hall.
resting a hand on the frame. He lowered his voice. “You OK?”
came near her she would collapse in those arms; arms she knew were strong
enough to hold her up. Arms she had missed for years. She hated herself for
wanting to feel them wrap around her again.
pain. She remembered other smiles, other glances across different rooms. She
sighed and looked back outside.
life still haunted her. She had worn his engagement ring through the last half
of their senior year. Then a month before their wedding day, he left. No
goodbye, just a letter—as if that was enough. Then poof. He was gone.
the past, but she had never figured out how to let it go. God knew she tried.
than anything else in her life, but the love never died. If only she could have
loved Peter with that same fervor, instead of the half-hearted love she had
given him. Oh, she had tried, but it wasn’t the same.
backyard for a long moment. Straightening her shoulders, she led the way down
the hall, stepping silently past Lukas.
___________________________________________
Daffodils, Available now. White Rose Publishing